Thursday, October 13, 2011

Anger & Stress

Anger gets me the worst. I am usually either quiet, or if not I am happy. I like my life style, and I love the people around me. I confuse myself because my heart tells me I am happy, but my thoughts yell for me to be angry, to be frustrated, to be stressed. I find hatred seething into my sight with no given warning or reason. It is blinding and obscures my vision to a point where I have to cry to get out the frustration. The anger is something new that I do not understand yet and I do not know how to react to it. Sometimes I feel it escalating out of control when I am in public, and I silence myself and act normal. It is not hard to act. I do not hide my personality and problems behind masks, I just be who I know I am. I am not an angry person. I know that I have a happy personality, and that is what makes me question myself even more.
I assume I do not have a mental illness, such as depression, ADD, or being bi-polar, since I have never experienced such anger and stress until this year. I believe it may be large life decisions like college, yet feel suppressed and frustrated because my choices for college are not mine to make. That does make me feel angry, but it’s more natural because I am given a reason to be mad. Otherwise, my life does not provide me any other reason. I will just see a person I do not know personally and just feel my emotions fly to unreasonable proportions. I become mad at them, my mind convincing my self that they deserve my anger and they should know it. I want to emotionally attack them and damage their self-esteem. I think these horrible thoughts and always realize what I am doing. I know it is wrong and am better off without the random thoughts of anger, but I feel as if it is uncontrolled instinct every time.
Then there is being tired. Since it has started to become cooler out, school and my second job started, I have lost a large amount of sleep compared to my common amount. I drag myself around in the morning, nodding my head on the brink of sleep during late night shifts at my first job, and skipping my homework assignments until the next day. The dark skin around my eyes seemed almost natural at first, until they expanded to a slight dark, pale, blue atop of my skin underneath my eyes. I yawn in the middle of the day, find myself loosing focus during my last class everyday, and putting off my chores. I can easily connect my anger to my lack of sleep, but I know that when I have great amounts of sleep in a past experience my attitude was different. I am a happy person, I do not understand how my attitude towards the world is spiraling in a different direction that I want it to.

Thursday, October 6, 2011

Toy Story & Friendship

In a small Fruit Market, a war wages between the Pears and the Apples. The history of the war isn’t well known because it ages so far back than the current generation of the story’s characters. Two main characters, Mac, the Apple, and Bosc, the Pear, meet at an agreement of wanting the war to end. They both choose to adventure through the vast market to each Fruit race in attempt to find what started the war, and hope that it will be the key to stop it. The story revolves mainly on how the two main characters, Mac and Bosc, connect with one another, forget their differences, and decide to overcome the war with each other's help. A similar relevant story to this plot is the story of Disney & Pixar’s Toy Story.
Toy Story is a well known and loved Disney movie full of many morals. The main moral presented is the power of friendship. Woody is a cowboy who lives with a young child named Andy, and is constantly played with. When another toy shows up, named Buzz Light-year, Woody becomes old and close to replaced by Buzz. The story is different from ‘Fruit Market’ in a way as there is no exploration of history and different cultures, and not an actual war, but more of a war between Buzz and Woody. Once replaced momentarily, Woody becomes vengeful, wanting to rid of Buzz and become the favorite toy for Andy again. As soon as Woody attacks Buzz, he also puts himself in danger.
As Buzz and Woody loose sight of Andy during the plot, their arguments seem to only become more frequent in the beginning of the rising action. They constantly fight as if wrapped up in their own small war to want to be with Andy the most. But, as the story and plot line progresses, the two see that they must work together to accomplish their task. This is portrayed strongly in the ending scene when they work together to reach Andy’s moving van. Woody is able to plan out their technique on how to reach the moving van in attempt to return to Andy. While Woody crafts the plan, Buzz is able to ‘glide’ them to the van when they are launched in the air. Their teamwork just grows stronger and stronger through out the movie.

The Legend of Tyler

In the December of 1996, my father received a gaming system called the Nintendo 64 as a Christmas present with several games included. He played constantly when he was home and I, being only two years old, would sit drooling in his lap, watching. My first several years of life I watched and grew up with the games. Once I had begun to develop more with my age I became enticed with the Nintendo, wanting to learn the controls and how the games worked. I played the game that captured my interest the most: The Legend of Zelda, Ocarina of Time. I spent my time learning the defined lines of good and evil and the significance of diversity. What I was able to learn from an aged game shaped my morals and who I am to this day.
In The Legend of Zelda, the main hero of the story, who you are, is Link. He is a young boy who is destined to save the land of Hyrule from an evil man named Ganondorf. These two main characters were chosen to each hold a third of the Triforce. The Triforce had three pieces, in which each represents a symbol. Link held courage, Zelda (not a large participant through out the story) held wisdom, and Ganondorf held power. The Triforce’s symbols, and how the character’s react to situations all portray an understanding of morals. You, the player who decides what to do, are taught what is right from wrong. Link is given decisions to help townsfolk, explore a dangerous map, or even just listen to what other characters have to say. You are only allowed to proceed with the game if you do what is right for other’s and be brave. I lived up to helping others and being kind, knowing that that is the strong and right thing to do. Then there was Ganondorf. Ganondorf tainted the power he was bestowed with, and became greedy for more. Ganondorf murdered, tricked, and destroyed many people and places through out the game, and being young had given me this fear of him and his wrong ways. I was able to learn how evil can grow from too much reign in life and only causes problems. I still remember the game in a way of how I can do better in life by being bold, kind, and caring, instead of taking advantage of people and becoming lustful for more.
There were several races that were acknowledged in The Legend of Zelda. There were the Hylians, Zoras, Gorons, Korkori, and Dekus. These five races all where shown as physically unrelated characters, but all had many things in common that showed me diversity. The Hylians where more human like, having more expansion through out Hyrule, while other races where designated to one district. The Zoras, graceful and kind creatures, lived only near the Hylian lake. The Gorons where strong, stubborn, and simple. They lived near a volcano in the rocky mountains where they would eat delicious rocks all day. The Korkori were small, weak, and hidden from the rest of the districts in a forest, while the Dekus lived in swamps and grassy lands. My mind separated each race from each other almost instinctively by the way each race had isolated themselves within their own lands. They all had problems that you, the Hero of Time, could only fix. In the end of the game, each race helps you to defeat Ganondorf in a final battle. I had learned the simple given fact that everyone should help one another, and as I grew older I realized that the game creators had given different cultures and races to show that working as one in society is a favorable community.
Today in the present, I still pick up a controller and play The Legend of Zelda. I enjoy the game exceedingly due to how it relates to me and my own morals. The Legend of Zelda is a powerful game that influenced me to how I am today and my decision making. I advise young children to learn what is right from wrong at an early stage so that they can grow up as loving, nice people in our world. They would all learn the same as I did, and I want to thank the creators of The Legend of Zelda for teaching me.Thank you.